I miss this...so much

Woedless Wednesday

Overwhelmed

So, as you all know I'm selling Avon now. It's overwhelming for me, because most people around here already have someone they buy from. So far I have 2 orders, from 2 customers. I still have to do some follow-ups and hand out a couple more books tomorrow, but still. I'm a bit sad about it. I'm giving myself 6 months to see if things pick up and if I can get a legitimate client base going. Hopefully I can, but I really don't know if I can do it. I've been turned down more often than not. I'm hopeful that my neighbor will place an order with me, and my land lord. I'm also going to get Justin to hand out books where he works at. I'm making fliers as well, hoping that will attract some people. Does anyone have any good promotion ideas I can use?

I'm really open minded....BUT

When I wake up to some shit like this, it honestly freaks me out a little. My neighbor, Danny aka Dick painted this shit on the road. This is seriously they type of thing that makes me think he's going to kidnap my blond haired blue eyed baby boy and sacrifice him. It's freaky. It's weird. It's disrespectful. Other than that, it's just plain wrong.

If you can tell, he drew pentagrams, in the shape of an upside down cross, several upside down crosses, the letters 666 as well as the words "F... God" and "F... Jesus" several times. I don't feel comfortable around him now. He's a nice enough guy, you know? He'll help you out if he can, but he has schizophrenia. I feel badly for him, really I do, but this is just crossing a line right here. He needs to have his medication changed, or be put back in Bar-H for a while or something. I don't even know if his Mother notified his doctor about this, although I hope that she did, because this is clearly a warning sign. He's a tortured soul, he hears voices that say really cruel things to him, I know he can't help it. But I find this to be extremely alarming.

13 things that I didn't know before being a Mother

13. That I'd be just as happy with a boy as I would be with a girl. ( I always wanted a little girl )

12. That being peed on isn't as gross as it sounds...as long as it's a baby that pees on you (haha)

11. That when you see those storys on the news about children being abducted, sexually molested, abused etc. that it would affect me so much more deeply and would make me want to curb stomp a mother fucker

10. Mothers instincs, it's not a bunch of bullshit that Moms talk about to make themselves seem like super heros (lol)

9. That it would hurt so bad when I have to hold my son down to get his shots. It makes me feel like a sort of kiddie executioner, and a horrible person.

8. I didn't expect to feel such a strong attachment to my son when he was first born, but from the minute I laid eyes on him and they laid him on my belly I haven't been the same. That's the moment in time when it really hit me, like a mac truck I might add, that this little person is, was and always will be the core of my universe.

7. Before I was pregnant with Aiden I thought breast feeding was gross, I famously said "I ain't walking around with no body attached to my titty, eww" as soon as I got pregnant and did my research though, I knew I would BF my son. It's not gross, it's beautiful, emotionally fulfilling, and the best bonding experience I could have had with my newborn son.

6. That I wouldn't mind getting up every 2 hours to feed him. No matter how sleep deprived I was, it was never "a burden" it was something that I actually enjoyed.

5. I never thought that I would actually go shopping, but 200 dollars worth of kid stuff, and a box of tampons and deoderant for myself.

4. That being selfless can actually be fulfilling, as long as you don't lose yourself completely.

3. That having a baby would actually strenghten the bond that I feel with my husband and bring us closer together. Seeing him with Aiden, how great he is with him, the look in his eyes when Aiden is telling him a "story" or giggling makes me fall in love with him all over again.

2. I never thought that someone so tiny, so helpless, someone who can't talk could inspire me in a thousand new ways daily, and most importantly to be a better person and live a better life.

1. That love really is unconditionl.